In Love With Love

There is a House of Love. And in this House, there are many rooms... many rooms... And in each room there is a secret that is revealed to your heart... And you may stay in that room for as long as you desire... But, this House of Love is not Paradise...

There is a hallway in this very same House of Love... few venture down the hall for there is no door at the other end: looking that way, you will see a wild garden... and you will see a large lion lounging in the shadows just outside... you will notice that he never turns his head, but continues, always, to stare intently into the hall... you can tell when his eyes lock onto yours... a chill goes up and down your spine as you beat a hasty retreat into the room that you had just left... you were safe... you were comfortable... you were well-fed and warm... you know that you can stay for as long as you want... perhaps you can be happy enough...

And so it goes... for a very long time, and so it goes... until one morning you awaken to a stirring of discontent where before, you were certain that you were happy... well, you were happy enough...

And so it goes... on and on it goes... until a kind of madness settles into your bones -- it always goes for the bones first... then the madness creeps into your consciousness -- it always happens first when you are sleeping... and then it just sort of  slips into your daydreams... and then, and then it is all that you can think about: that lion! that lion! that god-damn lion! you curse that lion without end...

You wonder: what does that lion protect? What secrets, what treasures, lie hidden in the wild garden protected by that lion? You imagine every possibility.. and then you even create possibilities no one has ever thought of before: and then you awaken with a start: there are soft padded foot-falls coming your way down the hallway... the foot-falls stop outside your door... you wait: sweat trickles between your frozen shoulder blades onto the bed beneath your body: damn damn damn everything... bile rises and the taste of your mind fills your mouth... why did you ever enter this House, and why did you ever decide to stay?

Day after day, and night after night, for so long that this House of Love has become for you the most hated thing in all of the universe... your laughter shutters your ears... until a new thought, and the last possible thought that you could ever think, enters your mind: you will give up, you will rise up with the courage you know that you do not possess, you will charge down the hall, and you will jump into the mouth of the lion, and you will feel his jaws close down upon you... and you will become the maddest of all the lovers lost, yet present, in the House of Love... you will, you will, eventually, you will...

The foot-falls come yet again to rest outside your door -- or was that just your imagination at work again? The comfortable terror rises again and then descends with its predictable force: but it doesn't matter anymore: for this moment is yours: you rise up and you cross the room to your door. Your hand clutches the door-knob, hesitating for one eternal moment -- but this moment belongs completely to you: you are the master of the door: it opens. You walk across the threshold. You turn to the right, and you turn to the right again: you see the light outside: the waiting lion rises to face you: saliva drips from his open mouth onto the ground: not trusting yourself to think, you finally give up your every thought: you had planned to run down his throat: but now you wonder if in fact you could make love to the lion -- but the wondering is a thing of the soul, for your mind has closed down upon itself... there is now only one homeless mind left behind as you walk right past the lion and on into the sunlight and into the waiting, the wild, Garden of Surrender... the green leaves of the bowing willow trees caress your hands and your face... there is a Light emanating from within every flower, every bush, every tree, every rock, every thing that you see -- everything is in-filled with the very same soul that is filling you: you turn for one last, loving,  look back: you bless and again you bless: warmth, and rain, and sun, and one one one upon everyone and everything in that beautiful, beautiful, House of Love: you turn again, and as you turn, you pick up the homeless mind you had left behind: and with the smile of perfect beauty, you thank the lion for his gift! And you simply walk the path before you... and you simply walk the path before you, and you listen to what everything sings: one song, one song... everything is one... and you feel yourself dissolve into the music of one love, and you fall completely and madly in love with Love, and in your falling, your mind finally serves its One purpose: it thinks the perfect thought: Everything is One: There is Only One: One Love... 

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